


fleeting glances

by hyucklees



Series: hidden gems - rarepair drabbles to make your heart melt [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Drabble, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-04 15:46:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14596335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyucklees/pseuds/hyucklees
Summary: renjun can't help but like a boy like donghyuck.





	fleeting glances

Renjun has a journal that he keeps in the second drawer of his dresser (under his mattress is too predictable) that began simply enough: a list of things that makes him happy. He used to write down every little thing about his day that made him happy: flowers, birds, small jokes, and all the beautiful things around him. But when his list got too extensive, he cut it down to just the things he loved.

The journal has effectively become a list of things that he loves about Donghyuck, but he would never call it that. Not out loud, at least. 

The first full page dedicated to Donghyuck was written on a day that Renjun woke up missing home. 

“Do you want to get Chinese food?” Donghyuck had said, not sure if that would help much at all.

“No, it’s okay,” Renjun said, his knees curled up into his chest. “Korean-Chinese food isn’t really much like Chinese-Chinese food at all.”

“Then let’s make our own,” Donghyuck said, pulling Renjun up by the hands so they were both standing. “I’m a good cook, and you can taste-test to see what I need to change to make it more like what you ate at home.”

Donghyuck has an apron that says ‘Kiss the Chef’, and every time he sees Donghyuck wearing it in the kitchen, he thinks back to Donghyuck asking “More soy sauce?” every time Renjun tasted the food, and Renjun saying “No” before correcting the recipe to get it that much closer to the way his mother used to cook. 

Renjun scribed every detail of that afternoon in the tattered old notebook back when it was still pristine. There’s a certain elegance to the way Renjun writes Donghyuck’s name, the ends of the characters curling in on themselves. It’s far prettier than the rest of his second-language handwriting (but he won’t admit that it came from doodling the name on every piece of paper he could find until it looked just right).

The longer Renjun’s notes continued to feature Donghyuck, the more abstract they became. Renjun’s pen always finds time to write about the way Donghyuck hums under his breath or the way his smiles were always the prettiest when he didn’t think anyone was looking. To say that Renjun is in love is nearly an understatement, but no one has dared to say if they as much as thought it was true. 

His hand always finds Donghyuck casually, maybe on a forearm or a shoulder, occasionally in between his fingers. His eyes always flicker to Donghyuck’s mouth, whether it’s a beaming smile or pulled tight in worry. The others might notice, the others might know Renjun’s heart better than himself, but there’s no conversation of what might be buried beneath the featherlight touches and the fleeting glances. What concerns Renjun more than anything is the idea of Donghyuck catching him staring too long or hearing things that were never meant to be said out loud.

“Injun?” Donghyuck says with a knock at the boy’s door, but he’s already turning the knob, so Renjun rushes to put the notebook under his pillow. “Hey, I thought you might be asleep already.”

“No, not yet,” Renjun smiles, patting the bed for Donghyuck to come sit next to him. “I’m surprised you’re not in bed, you had a long day today.”

Donghyuck walks over to the bed and plops himself down, landing and immediately leaning over to put his head onto Renjun’s shoulder.

“Long day is an understatement,” Donghyuck says as he lets his eyes fall shut. “I just wanted to come see you before I turned in for the night.”

Renjun hums back, just enjoying the moment of silence. He lets his eyes close not long after, one of his arms going to pull Donghyuck just a little bit closer to him. 

“Can I tell you something?” Donghyuck says, his eyes not bothering to open when Renjun squints through the light to look over at him. Renjun nods in agreement, and Donghyuck must feel him do it, because he breathes deep and shifts to get more comfortable at Renjun’s side. 

“Renjun, you make me really happy,” he breathes out, barely louder than a whisper. Renjun freezes, straight as a board, but Donghyuck doesn’t let that stop him. “I don’t know how to tell you how I’m feeling right now without, I don’t know, ruining that happiness? There’s not an easy way for me to say everything that’s on my mind, I just want you to know that you really mean a lot to me.”

Renjun thinks about saying something, but no words come to his mind,so he elects to hold Donghyuck a little bit tighter in response. He wonders if there’s something he’s missing, a nuance he didn’t pick up on in the words, but Donghyuck is sitting up and turning to look at him before he can break it all down word by word.

“I like you, Renjun,” he says, eyes locked on Renjun’s and not letting go of his gaze. “I have liked you, for quite a while. But I like being your friend just as much. I just think that being friends will be a lot easier once you know how I feel and we put all of those kind of feelings behind us.”

“What if I liked you too?” Renjun asks after a moment and is surprised to see Donghyuck’s eyes flicker away from Renjun’s and into his own lap instead.

“You don’t have to say that,” Donghyuck says with a smile, but he doesn’t have the soft lilt in his voice that usually comes with it. “I told you, I really am happy with you being my friend.”

“Do you remember when we made dinner together? I was homesick, and you offered to cook Chinese food to make me feel better. We spent all day in the kitchen and dirtied every pan in the whole house.” Donghyuck nods and his eyebrows furrow as he tries to follow Renjun’s train of thought.

“I’ve liked you that long, Donghyuck,” Renjun says as the hands holding on to his squeeze at his fingers.

“What?” Donghyuck asks, pausing for a moment only to ask again while sounding even more confused.

“You need to go to sleep, you can’t even understand what I’m saying,” Renjun smiles lightly, but the voice in his head is shrieking at the scene that’s just unfolded in front of him. 

“Right, bed,” Donghyuck says, leaning forward to push himself up off the mattress, but Renjun tugs him to lay down on the bed instead.

“Just sleep here.” This may be the bravest that Renjun has been in his whole life, but he has to make the most of his newfound bravery before it withers away. 

Suddenly, Donghyuck’s brain seems to comprehend Renjun’s arms pulling him into his chest. He scrambles to look up at Renjun, doe-eyed and confused.

“You like me?” Donghyuck says, his hands bracing against Renjun’s chest. Renjun just nods back, a smile plastered on his face at the realization that he’s able to say yes. In a moment of courage, Renjun plants a kiss on Donghyuck’s forehead and he can almost swear that Donghyuck chases after him for a moment when he pulls away.

“Now go to sleep,” Renjun says, watching as Donghyuck squirms until he’s comfortable pressed into Renjun’s arms. Somehow, over the sound of Renjun’s thumping heart, Donghyuck finds sleep within minutes and Renjun is left to count the freckles on his skin until sleep takes him over as well. 

**Author's Note:**

> installment #2 of my curiouscat rarepair request series ^^ renhyuck is one of the rarest dreamie pairings imo, but the interactions that we do get between them are wonderful :(
> 
> twitter: hesmarklee  
> curiouscat: nctdad


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